a giant steaming pile of shit. Thanks, Ralph. With your help, we might luck out with a repeat of the 2000 election, when you stole the race from the Democrats.
All your consumer goodnik-ness has been lost, especially if you force another GOP in the big house. Quit while you're ahead.
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Friday, February 22, 2008
Plastic Surgery Gone Bad
Please Donatella, stop with the surgery, Botox, etc. Otherwise you'll have to accept that you're an unemployed Muppet (from the looks of you these days).
Snow - close 'er down
I'm officially sick of winter in the suburbs. It makes me realize that I must live somewhere you can walk around where sidewalks are shoveled and commerce can be had easily when bad weather rolls in.
I've been housebound for two days this week, meaning I did not leave to work out, or do anything. It's just not worth the hassle to try and drive around, especially when the temps have been in the teens and 20s and the ice on top of the snow is treacherous. And our street is the last one in the city to get plowed. Luckily I work from home, so this has not affected my livelihood (although Yahoo! did the other day. To their partial credit, they fixed it, but that was scary).
I'm jonesin' for some Szechaun chicken for lunch today, and it just won't happen. The place is too far, and the only thing that can be delivered around here is pizza. And, sorry Domino's, I don't want it.
I do, however, enjoy the mob mentality at the grocery stores the day before a big storm. It's like Armageddon....the shelves are wiped clean. It feels like you wake up in Whoville on Christmas morning ("...The Grinch even took the last can of Who-Hash").
Also, I miss you, NYC, because you never let a little nor'easter get you down. And if you did, you slapped on your snow boots and walked to the park. There is definitely something to be said about underground transportation as well.
Please spring. Come soon.
I've been housebound for two days this week, meaning I did not leave to work out, or do anything. It's just not worth the hassle to try and drive around, especially when the temps have been in the teens and 20s and the ice on top of the snow is treacherous. And our street is the last one in the city to get plowed. Luckily I work from home, so this has not affected my livelihood (although Yahoo! did the other day. To their partial credit, they fixed it, but that was scary).
I'm jonesin' for some Szechaun chicken for lunch today, and it just won't happen. The place is too far, and the only thing that can be delivered around here is pizza. And, sorry Domino's, I don't want it.
I do, however, enjoy the mob mentality at the grocery stores the day before a big storm. It's like Armageddon....the shelves are wiped clean. It feels like you wake up in Whoville on Christmas morning ("...The Grinch even took the last can of Who-Hash").
Also, I miss you, NYC, because you never let a little nor'easter get you down. And if you did, you slapped on your snow boots and walked to the park. There is definitely something to be said about underground transportation as well.
Please spring. Come soon.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
The douchebagginess begins
Seriously, how unoriginally lame can one be?
And later, the story of AVD and how it became a tradition.....
And later, the story of AVD and how it became a tradition.....
Monday, February 11, 2008
On purpose?
So why is it that every picture of a campaigning candidate is Hilary with some unfortunate candid look on her face. Like this, from the New York Times today.
Where are the funny glimpses of Barak or McCain? Is it because she's a woman? Or is it because she's a polarizing woman? Or is it because her tough facade is hard to crack, and the media wants to do all they can to abuse her? I mean, what woman likes a bad picture of herself? (Britney Spears, you are hereby removed from this conversation).
Is the media ganging up on her? Hilary is a fairly photogenic person (let's try to forget about her first few years as First Lady, before the hair cut and makeover). So why do they pick on her with bad photos? Or is it only a bad photo because she's a woman?
I mean, there are plenty of stupid-looking pictures of George Bush with his little cowboy sneer or monkey lips. But it never makes me think of him differently politically. This photo of Hilary annoys me and it makes me dislike her just a bit.
Is this on purpose? Talk amongst yourselves...
Thursday, February 07, 2008
The election plot thickens
So Romney's out. Huh. Now unless Huckabee blows ahead in some crazy blaze of scary insanity, I could actually tolerate having McCain in office. I won't vote for him, and am still pretty turned off by his move to the evil bedsheets of our current president, after said President royally screwed him over in the 2000 GOP nom, but IF he happened to be elected, it definitely would not be the worst Republican that could be in the White House. He is moderate on many issues, and has done some good things in his tenure in the Senate. He also fought in Vietnam and was imprisoned and tortured as a result, and I'm all for anyone with an actual service background (at least in the GOP), who didn't try to get out of actual fighting with the help of his powerful father.
However, I will vote democratically, but am very down the middle as to which candidate I prefer at the moment. Since I'm no longer living in NY and was only a registered party member there, my vote won't count in the primary this year, which is fine. I'm actually so firmly against the primary/electoral college/delegate process, maybe I should register as an independent from now on anyway.
So, I've kind of passed my civic buck at the moment, not voting in a primary. But whichever Dem is on the ballot in November gets my tick.
I'm just saying, in a worst-case scenario for me, as a democratic voter, McCain is not the scariest option (thank goodness Rudy is out. Yikes.).
I'm just waiting for Bloomberg for Prez. Then we'll talk.
However, I will vote democratically, but am very down the middle as to which candidate I prefer at the moment. Since I'm no longer living in NY and was only a registered party member there, my vote won't count in the primary this year, which is fine. I'm actually so firmly against the primary/electoral college/delegate process, maybe I should register as an independent from now on anyway.
So, I've kind of passed my civic buck at the moment, not voting in a primary. But whichever Dem is on the ballot in November gets my tick.
I'm just saying, in a worst-case scenario for me, as a democratic voter, McCain is not the scariest option (thank goodness Rudy is out. Yikes.).
I'm just waiting for Bloomberg for Prez. Then we'll talk.
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
Monday, February 04, 2008
Like mother, like daughter
Does anyone else agree with me in that the new Kate Hudson/Matthew McConaughey vehicle, Fool's Gold, look surprisingly like a less-good version of the classic Goldie Hawn/Kurt Russell vehicle Overboard. However, the fact that they're keeping it in the family I can appreciate.
Premise: Rich blonde woman attempts to screw over dull poor guy, who then proceeds to screw rich lady both literally and figuratively. However, in Overboard, we have a dash of amnesia suffered by Goldie, so she doesn't actually remember screwing over dull guy, but he doesn't soon forget. Hijinx ensue at her expense, but then the poor schlub falls in love with her. And...scene.
It looks like Fool's Gold is a poor man's imitation, since I'll take Goldie Hawn with plates glued to her hands while helping design a miniature golf course any day of the week (you must see it to believe it). Also, I get sucked into watching it every magical time it's on TNT or TBS.
Premise: Rich blonde woman attempts to screw over dull poor guy, who then proceeds to screw rich lady both literally and figuratively. However, in Overboard, we have a dash of amnesia suffered by Goldie, so she doesn't actually remember screwing over dull guy, but he doesn't soon forget. Hijinx ensue at her expense, but then the poor schlub falls in love with her. And...scene.
It looks like Fool's Gold is a poor man's imitation, since I'll take Goldie Hawn with plates glued to her hands while helping design a miniature golf course any day of the week (you must see it to believe it). Also, I get sucked into watching it every magical time it's on TNT or TBS.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
There's this thing called the internet...
There are two parts of the internet that literally astound me every time I sit down to actually think about them. Sure, emailing is key, and getting information is wonderful. But those things were easy enough before (remember actually writing letters and reading the newspaper? Yeah.)
The two most amazing occurrences on the internet are Maps and Job Searches. I was just chatting with my friend and wondered, "How did anyone find a job before the internet?" He aptly replied "It's probably why people stayed at the same company their whole lives." This, I think, is true. I think it's also why urban areas are being revitalized and former dead zones in the US are now booming (case in point, the good ol' desert of the Southwest). There are more opportunities for people to move out of their comfort zone of home, and see what the world has to offer. As I am currently self-employed (fancy terminology for being broke, but loving it), I can literally pick up and move anywhere. With the beauty of Craigslist, I can find a sublet or temporary housing with the click of a mouse.
As far as maps, sure I can read a map. But ohmigod, mapping things on Google Maps or MapQuest is so beyond better, because it's a no-brainer, and it tells you exactly where to go. And you know we all love those faux-directions they give like "slight left at ramp" which literally means, merge onto the ramp. A little less specifics wouldn't be so bad, but still. And I know that in maybe the next 10 years, we're all going to consider the Google Map satellite function as an invasion of privacy, it's pretty sweet to be able to check out IN REAL TIME what a neighborhood looks like. I checked out a new Google Map function today while perusing Craigslist for an apartment. They now have a little tab called "Street View." I can click on that, zoom in, and voila, look at THE BUILDING I AM THINKING OF LIVING IN.
Holy fuck. I just reblew my own mind. God love you, dear internet. Now, bring me some cake, dammit!
The two most amazing occurrences on the internet are Maps and Job Searches. I was just chatting with my friend and wondered, "How did anyone find a job before the internet?" He aptly replied "It's probably why people stayed at the same company their whole lives." This, I think, is true. I think it's also why urban areas are being revitalized and former dead zones in the US are now booming (case in point, the good ol' desert of the Southwest). There are more opportunities for people to move out of their comfort zone of home, and see what the world has to offer. As I am currently self-employed (fancy terminology for being broke, but loving it), I can literally pick up and move anywhere. With the beauty of Craigslist, I can find a sublet or temporary housing with the click of a mouse.
As far as maps, sure I can read a map. But ohmigod, mapping things on Google Maps or MapQuest is so beyond better, because it's a no-brainer, and it tells you exactly where to go. And you know we all love those faux-directions they give like "slight left at ramp" which literally means, merge onto the ramp. A little less specifics wouldn't be so bad, but still. And I know that in maybe the next 10 years, we're all going to consider the Google Map satellite function as an invasion of privacy, it's pretty sweet to be able to check out IN REAL TIME what a neighborhood looks like. I checked out a new Google Map function today while perusing Craigslist for an apartment. They now have a little tab called "Street View." I can click on that, zoom in, and voila, look at THE BUILDING I AM THINKING OF LIVING IN.
Holy fuck. I just reblew my own mind. God love you, dear internet. Now, bring me some cake, dammit!
Monday, January 21, 2008
Over the Rhine redux
I happened to have "Brothers and Sisters" on TV last night (I have heard good things about the show, but cannot commit to another drama for the season - I am fully stocked with "Gossip Girl" and "Law & Order: SVU") and I was beyond thrilled to hear an Over the Rhine song playing in a scene! It's not one of my favorite songs by them, but a good one nonetheless, and it was playing loudly enough that it didn't fade into the background.
SIDENOTE: "Felicity" wins, hands-down, for having the best OTR song in one of the most appropriate scenes. I think it was in the second-to-last season and one of the cast members leaves a goodbye video. You'll have to traverse IMDB for the full details.
If you'd like to check it out, it should be on iTunes or their website. Title: "Born."
More on my misadventures in Michigan very soon!
SIDENOTE: "Felicity" wins, hands-down, for having the best OTR song in one of the most appropriate scenes. I think it was in the second-to-last season and one of the cast members leaves a goodbye video. You'll have to traverse IMDB for the full details.
If you'd like to check it out, it should be on iTunes or their website. Title: "Born."
More on my misadventures in Michigan very soon!
Friday, December 21, 2007
CNN.com foils me again!
Well, at least it's not my home page on my personal computer. However, the lame headlines at CNN.com do intrigue me at times, and I cave - even if it's just clicking through to read the lame first 3 sentences (I don't mess with the crap "Story Highlights" mumbo-jumbo). But the one feature that I find myself obsessed with and not being able to turn away from are the photos. When I see that arrow within a story that shows more than one picture is available, it's the jackpot.
I guess since I don't read tabloids (I refuse to pay $4 for a magazine that is all pictures of celebs, although I will glance at one now and again at, say, the gym, or on a long flight), it's my fix.
Sidenote: It's the darkest evening of the year. And The Darkest Night of the Year goes to Over the Rhine, my favorite band's lovely holiday album. Their original song "Mary's Waltz" is gorgeous.
I guess since I don't read tabloids (I refuse to pay $4 for a magazine that is all pictures of celebs, although I will glance at one now and again at, say, the gym, or on a long flight), it's my fix.
Sidenote: It's the darkest evening of the year. And The Darkest Night of the Year goes to Over the Rhine, my favorite band's lovely holiday album. Their original song "Mary's Waltz" is gorgeous.
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Rip Van Winkle
These days, you can call me Rip Van Winkle or Sleeping Beauty. Basically, I have been back to the humbling midwest for 49 days (more than a month, not quite 2). The New York pining has begun....in bits and pieces. There will always be things I miss about New York - the pizza, the bagels, my friends, the food choices, the walking everywhere, running in Central Park, NYSC, 3 Banana Republic's with amazing sale selections within a 10-block radius of my apt, etc.
Sidenote: Bagels are so mediocre here, and just not quite "right" that they must be toasted. And I have caved in to this.
But back to my post. The thing I absolutely, in no way whatsoever, don't miss is lack of sleep. I actually never really realized how sleep-deprived I was in NY until I came back here. In NY, I would get up one, sometimes two times a night to go to the bathroom because I was awakened by something - car, alarm, loud building tenants, dog barking, garbage truck, yelling, etc. I was in a constant state of exhaustion, no matter how much sleep I got.
Now, in the 49 days that I've been back, I dream again (I kind of want to stop remembering them, as they are fucked up and very macabre. I am positive that Tim Burton directs them), and sleep soundly. In fact, I'm so rested, I don't find myself needing that mid-afternoon caffeine fix anymore. It's quite pleasant.
All said, I do look forward to the day when a 4 AM sanitation truck rumbling my windows wakes me again. I do love me some big-city-livin'. But I also like catching up on 7 years of sleep deprivation.
Sidenote: Bagels are so mediocre here, and just not quite "right" that they must be toasted. And I have caved in to this.
But back to my post. The thing I absolutely, in no way whatsoever, don't miss is lack of sleep. I actually never really realized how sleep-deprived I was in NY until I came back here. In NY, I would get up one, sometimes two times a night to go to the bathroom because I was awakened by something - car, alarm, loud building tenants, dog barking, garbage truck, yelling, etc. I was in a constant state of exhaustion, no matter how much sleep I got.
Now, in the 49 days that I've been back, I dream again (I kind of want to stop remembering them, as they are fucked up and very macabre. I am positive that Tim Burton directs them), and sleep soundly. In fact, I'm so rested, I don't find myself needing that mid-afternoon caffeine fix anymore. It's quite pleasant.
All said, I do look forward to the day when a 4 AM sanitation truck rumbling my windows wakes me again. I do love me some big-city-livin'. But I also like catching up on 7 years of sleep deprivation.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
QVC
Lately, I have been flipping through the 5 or so TV shopping channels that are at the beginning of the channel lineup these days. This was the predecessor to internet shopping. Now, having worked in the book biz, we like these shows - they still sell a crapload of books. Who's buying, who knows? I don't know how you can even watch these channels for more than a minute because they stuff they sell is some of the most hideous garbage I have EVER seen.
Ok, to their credit, there is some decent stuff for sale. The skin care lines and make-up lines seem to be doing well. And at least it's name brand stuff. But who thinks the jewelry is attractive? The clothing? It looks old-ladylike and costume-y. Maybe it's just because I'm over gold jewelry. But the combinations of stones they put together...they must be designed by someone who's color-blind.
This is what my life has bubbled down to. Blogging about QVC. Yikes.
Ok, to their credit, there is some decent stuff for sale. The skin care lines and make-up lines seem to be doing well. And at least it's name brand stuff. But who thinks the jewelry is attractive? The clothing? It looks old-ladylike and costume-y. Maybe it's just because I'm over gold jewelry. But the combinations of stones they put together...they must be designed by someone who's color-blind.
This is what my life has bubbled down to. Blogging about QVC. Yikes.
I'm back!
More in the next post...at least it's not a New Year's Resolution this year! I'm going out with a bang, baby....
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Save the books!
Books are an endangered species. Well, not books per se - believe me, we publish more and more of them every year. But book coverage is shrinking - already in the last year we've (collective we, as in "the book publishing industry," of which I am part of) seen 4 major metro newspaper nix coverage altogether. And now, the latest casualty, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. But finally, an uproar!
The industry will not take this. Already I see more reviews and coverage of video games than books anymore. It's an uphill battle that I wage daily, as a publicist who's main job description is to get review coverage for books. In the more than 6 years that I have been in this industry, I've seen it change dramatically - for the better and worse. I won't get into the boring details here.
But, if you read books, as I do, or you like books, or even if you just use them to wipe your ass (blasphemy!), sign the petition to save book coverage (and perhaps, books) here.
And after that, read a hilarious posting from one of my favorite all-around great authors (and people) George Saunders, certified genius. And join his Army here.
The industry will not take this. Already I see more reviews and coverage of video games than books anymore. It's an uphill battle that I wage daily, as a publicist who's main job description is to get review coverage for books. In the more than 6 years that I have been in this industry, I've seen it change dramatically - for the better and worse. I won't get into the boring details here.
But, if you read books, as I do, or you like books, or even if you just use them to wipe your ass (blasphemy!), sign the petition to save book coverage (and perhaps, books) here.
And after that, read a hilarious posting from one of my favorite all-around great authors (and people) George Saunders, certified genius. And join his Army here.
Tuesday, April 10, 2007
CNN NOT Breaking News
Contrary to popular belief, this is not breaking news, CNN. Or anyone else for that matter, unless you're a tabloid.
Are we fighting a war here, people, or what?!
Thursday, April 05, 2007
Happy 20th, Fox!
Dear Fox,
Thank you for bringing us Married, With Children, the Gary Shandling Show, the Tracey Ullman Show, and the Simpsons (and more recently Arrested Development).
Sorry you ever went to the dark side and had to bring us Bill O'Reilly and Geraldo, and Joe Millionaire, and I Want to Marry a Millionaire and other crappy reality shows.
So fondly I remember Al Bundy and Francesca. Happy birthday!
Thank you for bringing us Married, With Children, the Gary Shandling Show, the Tracey Ullman Show, and the Simpsons (and more recently Arrested Development).
Sorry you ever went to the dark side and had to bring us Bill O'Reilly and Geraldo, and Joe Millionaire, and I Want to Marry a Millionaire and other crappy reality shows.
So fondly I remember Al Bundy and Francesca. Happy birthday!
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
The Latin Mint
So who knew? Tic Tacs are a product of Ecuador (says so right on the package).
Damn I love the orange ones. So un-minty, but sweetly delicious for just 1.9 calories per mint! Sugar kick, hi-yaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Crap, I also can't stop eating them.
Damn I love the orange ones. So un-minty, but sweetly delicious for just 1.9 calories per mint! Sugar kick, hi-yaaaaaaaaaaaa!
Crap, I also can't stop eating them.
I love you FCC!
Finally, the FCC does something smart by banning cell phone use on airplanes!
Just having to deal with morons talking on their cell phones on city buses, which is the most annoying thing ever (and don't even get me started on the dumb girl behind me in the lunch line yesterday who was talking to someone about what to get for lunch...lame!), the air travel cell phone debacle would be disruptive an unbearable. Especially when you think about how loudly people would have to talk to be heard over the plane noise. I know I have to crank my headphones when I'm on a plane because of this large, noise-inducer called an engine.
Let's hope this rule sticks (and if the FAA can please just relax the damn carry on rules so I don't have to check everything? Thanks).
Just having to deal with morons talking on their cell phones on city buses, which is the most annoying thing ever (and don't even get me started on the dumb girl behind me in the lunch line yesterday who was talking to someone about what to get for lunch...lame!), the air travel cell phone debacle would be disruptive an unbearable. Especially when you think about how loudly people would have to talk to be heard over the plane noise. I know I have to crank my headphones when I'm on a plane because of this large, noise-inducer called an engine.
Let's hope this rule sticks (and if the FAA can please just relax the damn carry on rules so I don't have to check everything? Thanks).
Monday, April 02, 2007
Crazy Train Rides Again
I'm just thrilled (sense the sarcasm) to see that batshit Judith Regan is back. And clearly more childish and moronic than ever. Goodie gumdrops! Crash and burn, lady, crash and burn!
Regan Launches New Venture
Judith Regan, whose publishing company was shut down last December by imprint HarperCollins, has founded a new publishing venture. Like ReganBooks, Chutzpah Press will specialize in what Regan, in a long, rambling statement, called "books that go to the edge, call into question, get in the face, never surrender and are distinguished by utter originality."
Chutzpah's first title, scheduled to be released in the second half of July, is called Harry Potter and the Secret of the Purpose-Driven Da Vinci Code Life.Chutzpah's literary imprint, Schizophrenic House, has already signed up several volumes of poetry and thoughtful first fiction.
In her announcement, Reagan also complained of being unfairly forced to stay after school one day in fourth grade.
Regan Launches New Venture
Judith Regan, whose publishing company was shut down last December by imprint HarperCollins, has founded a new publishing venture. Like ReganBooks, Chutzpah Press will specialize in what Regan, in a long, rambling statement, called "books that go to the edge, call into question, get in the face, never surrender and are distinguished by utter originality."
Chutzpah's first title, scheduled to be released in the second half of July, is called Harry Potter and the Secret of the Purpose-Driven Da Vinci Code Life.Chutzpah's literary imprint, Schizophrenic House, has already signed up several volumes of poetry and thoughtful first fiction.
In her announcement, Reagan also complained of being unfairly forced to stay after school one day in fourth grade.
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