Seriously, Down With Oprah

Perhaps I was just blind, dumb, or drunk for the entire reign of Queen Biyatch herself, Oprah, and her reign of terror that started 2 decades ago and unfortunately continues today, but isn't her whole MO "to help people." I mean, isn't that why she has the quack Dr. Phil firmly planted up her tush? I mean, she gave out cars to underprivileged people! She helped with disasters! She got people to read! She brought "The Color Purple" to Broadway! Oh, Oprah, how could we survive without you telling us what to do?!

Funny then, that she just ruined James Frey's life for really no good reason at all. Well, I guess her reason is that he made her look bad. Because with the big O, it's really just all about her. At least her magazine circulation is falling steadily.

When will those middle-aged God-fearing housewives stop drinking her crappy kool-aid? I mean, it just ain't good. She doesn't put sugar in it or anything - just a big ol' shot of bitter. Then again, bitter is the new black (but this one's actually good...)

Oprah is the Enron of TV: Get as high as you can go, and then start destroying everyone below you.

Nice tattoo

Wow, so many horrible things i could say about this guy, but let's just leave it at, man....if you didn't already think a picture was worth a thousand words, here's proof...

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/0217061fy1.html

Down with Dunkin Donuts

I think Starbucks coffee is garbage and an absolute rip-off (although they make a mean rice krispie treat). Hence, my coffee of choice when purchasing is Dunkin Donuts. There's been this big surge of them in Manhattan in the past few years, and a big hullaballoo about "coffee class wars" - mainly, the upwardly mobile yuppies who send their kindergartners to $30,000 a year private schools drink the grandiose Starbucks, and the young, urban broke-ass hipsters prefer the DD. Personally, this does make some sense to me, since DD is a cheaper and better cup of coffee than Starbucks, especially since the 'Bucks continues to raise their prices and shrink their cups. I digress.

This past fall a new DD opened a block from my office. Oh, devil store! Unless I want to lose my mind, I refuse to go in there before 11 AM, because one thing that the 'Bucks has going for it that DD doesn't, is that it is a well-oiled machine. Think of Starbucks as the Lexus of coffee shops and DD the Dodge Neon. Functional, and that's about it. Again, I digress.

So every now and again, an afternoon calls for a DD run. This afternoon proved to be no exception, so I went with my friend MAZ and grabbed some joe. My order is not hard. Medium coffee with skim milk. I tossed in a Splenda - again, not hard.

What do I get? Coffee, skim milk, and sugar. HOW HARD is it to put one packet of Splenda instead of 5 scoops of sugar?! I mean, I know Splenda is made from sugar, but that's stretching it.

DD is testing my nerve. I normally put the Splenda in myself, but wanted to give them another shot. I was trusting today. I will not trust again. They will get very few more chances. Until ice coffee season. Then it's free game again.

Winter Wonderland

Park Ave at 89th St, 2:30 PM

27 inches of snow! Biggest snowfall on record! WOO! After a leisurely morning of coffee and homemade bluberry pancakes, my boyfriend and I braced the blizzard to check out the snowfall and swing by his pad across town to pick up few things. It was boo-tiful!

I will be hating trudging through the gray disgusting slush and trying to avoid corner lakes the size of my pond back home, but there is nothing I love more than NY covered in snow. It's quiet and everyone's out enjoying it, and there's barely any traffic and it's just slow and wonderful.

I will be cursing it tomorrow, but today, I was so happy, I just pounced into a pile of snow. I wanted to make a snow angel, but thought that might be too much. I definitely made sure to avoid the yellow stuff.

Boredom and business, etc.

Well, I've been quite busy at the ol' ball and chain (aka job) and just haven't had an interesting thought in my head lately. Hence the lack of posts.

Perhaps tomorrow, a Friday, I'll have something more interesting to say. I will say I went to this hellish horrid kickboxing class last night. Left after about 7 minutes because I don't need a fat dude who's not even exercising screaming at me to kick it. I also did not sign up for boot camp. Jerk. Give me a spinning class any day of the week.

I also love the Arctic Monkeys. Lord knows it can get cold in the UK.

Speaking of cold, a supposed Nor'easter is rolling in this weekend. Um, it was 6o in January. No fair.

Little Britain rides again

I was just informed via Gawker that my most favorite-ist TV series EVER has it's 3rd season coming to BBC America in March. I might seriously have to get cable for this. If you have not seen Little Britain, add it to your Netflix queue immediately. You don't want to be the last one on the bandwagon like you were with the British version of The Office, do you? And by the way, Little Britain is about a million times funnier than The Office, although I do love Ricky Gervais and that Gareth is one great jackass.

Little Britain is just 2 brilliant guys, mostly dressing in drag, acting as these hilarious and wacky recurring characters. Think of it as a cross between Kids in the Hall and Monty Python. British humor at its weirdest and finest. Really, rent this.

Sun shines, furry rodent scampers back in hole

He saw his shadow! So six more weeks of winter. I figured as much, given the mild temps this winter.

On a side note, I feel as though I've lived this week 4 times already. Groundhog Week perhaps?

Twilight Toilet Zone

There is some funky stuff going on in our office bathroom today. This besides the usual "funk" that goes on in there, which I will not get into.

I get in there around 9:10 AM this morning to wash the subway funk off my hands (I call it my kryptonite hand, because anything I touch with it will shrivel and die) and decide to walk into the stalls section to take a tinkle. I open the door from the sinks area to the stalls area and there is an old-lady corset laying in the middle of the floor. At first glance, I thought someone had dropped a peach-colored vest on the floor and then thought, who wears vests anymore? So I took a closer look and there are eye hooks all up the back of it, and it is most definitely a corset. I even went so far as to look for a body under the stall - maybe some old woman passed out or something. Alas, just a corset. On the bathroom floor. At 9 AM. Huh. A few hours later, it had migrated to a hook on the other sinks area, on the opposite side of the stall area. I fear it might have grown legs and gotten there itself - it was a little worse for the wear.

I just made another pit stop and in my stall was a "Surviving Personal Bankruptcy" galley. Now, working in publishing, it is not uncommon to occasionally find a book or galley (pre-book, basically) in the sinks area. But this one was firmly entrenched on the toilet paper holder IN the stall. I guess someone was contemplating their debt while dropping off the kids.

And don't even get me started on the "nesters." That will be for another time.