Recovered!

One of my favorite paintings has been found!

More bathroom antics

Does the week before Labor Day bring out the worst in people? Well, our bathroom at work is generally disgusting and filled with a few weirdos who make it unbearable for the rest of us normal folks, so probably not, but just saw the latest freak!

So as I was washing my hands, I saw the sink next to me FILLED with suds (and the culprit, who I dislike on account of her overt oddness and bitchy demeanor, was leaving, so I know now who she is!). Seriously, how OCD are you that you need to fill an entire sink with suds? It's such a damn waste, on so many levels.

The freaks in this city are like pigeons, rats, and cockroaches - they will be the only survivors in a nuclear winter, because the cannot be human.

CNN outdoes itself

Gotta love this headline on CNN this morning:

Police: Throbbing artery gave polygamist away

At least it was just his artery that was throbbing...although he is a sex freak and most likely a pedophile. So perhaps I'm wrong in my thinking...

A Devil Grows in Kettering

Check out the sweet tomato my dad picked in our yard last week. Clearly, we're channeling Satan via soil. Or perhaps it's attack of the killer tomatoes?

My dad says it's a "devil of a tomato."

But perhaps it's a unicorn, if you want to take the shiny happy road. But seeing as it was grown in Ohio, it has that evil GOP-red-state-taint on it, so I'm going with devil.

Chronicles of Snasty, Vol. 1

At my chica Erica's request, and on her tip, I've decided to write about the further disgusting freaks that frequent the 5th Fl. bathroom at my hub of employment, 375 Hudson St.

Erica just let me know that someone was clipping their toenails in the bathroom. I guess I should at least be happy that they were in a closed stall doing this (Erica heard the clips and saw the stance, hence how she knew) , since I've seen people do this on the subway in the open, no qualms at all.

However, SHE WAS CLIPPING HER TOENAILS IN A WORKPLACE BATHROOM! I tend to think there are bylaws in my company that do not allow this. And Erica verified that one leg was up ON the toilet seat for the proper clippage. This is distrubing on many levels, because now I might end up sitting on her snasty foot. And lord hopes she got some funk on her foot, if she's tacky enough to clip the toes over the toilet.

It is completely unacceptable anywhere aside from over a wastebasket in your home or bathroom (Erica concurs).

Bring on your snasty workplace bathroom stories!

Chronicles of Snasty, Vol. 1

At my chica Erica's request, and on her tip, I've decided to write about the further disgusting freaks that frequent the 5th Fl. bathroom at my hub of employment, 375 Hudson St.

Erica just let me know that someone was clipping their toenails in the bathroom. I guess I should at least be happy that they were in a closed stall doing this (Erica heard the clips and saw the stance, hence how she knew) , since I've seen people do this on the subway in the open, no qualms at all.

However, SHE WAS CLIPPING HER TOENAILS IN A WORKPLACE BATHROOM! I tend to think there are bylaws in my company that do not allow this. And Erica verified that one leg was up ON the toilet seat for the proper clippage. This is distrubing on many levels, because now I might end up sitting on her snasty foot. And lord hopes she got some funk on her foot, if she's tacky enough to clip the toes over the toilet.

It is completely unacceptable anywhere aside from over a wastebasket in your home or bathroom (Erica concurs).

Bring on your snasty workplace bathroom stories!

So many freaks, so little time

Wow, this morning's commute was a freakshow bonanza! On the train, I noticed a guy with a headband. You read correctly - he was wearing one of those thin plastic headbands that I used to have in every color as a little girl. You could even see the teeth tracks in his hair. To his credit, it was an understated brown. He was a normal enough looking guy, dressed well, nice shoes (such a key component for a man), so it was a bit off-putting and confusing.

There was also some woman sharing the elevator with me wearing absolutely the most absurd sunglasses I have ever seen. They were like giant white octagons, and just silly. She looked like Bootsy Collins.

I might need to go out at lunch - is it a full moon or something? Or perhaps it has something to do with the fact that my entire science education has been based on a lie, with the demotion of Pluto. Poor Pluto - didn't it have enough going against it anyway?

The perfect food?

I just snacked on some Honey Nut Cheerios. Here in Manhattan, a box of cereal will run you $4-6. I'm not kidding. So I only purchase cereal when it's on sale. A little tip, CVS and Rite Aid, yes drugstores, always have the best sales. I can snag 2 boxes for the price of one when they go on sale, with great frequency.

But I digress.

Back to the Cheerios. I think they could possibly be the perfect food. I'll eat HNC for meals, and a snack. Their flavor is just perfection. Occasionally I've digressed to Target brand, and there's something just a little off. I get to the point that I crave them. One love.

Quiz: What's the name of the HNC bee? I can't remember for the life of me. And I'm too lazy to google.

Twisty Delight

I love pretzels. LOVE THEM. Like, I could eat them every day, and often do. I've been a pretzel fan since elementary or junior high school, always bringing them in my lunch. In high school, they were my lunch. I just finished a bag of Rold Gold Tiny Twists as an afternoon snack. I have to say that Rold Gold Thins are my favorite, and I will often leave work to walk to the deli on the corner, just to buy the 99 cent bag of Thins. The salt is perfect, the pretzel crisp and crunchy. Just perfect. Substitues will not do. I'm a pretzel snob.

So to my delight this weekend, my boyfriend and I tried a new restaurant in my nighborhood, Wicker Park. Very delish, and am looking forward to going back. When they brought out the bread basket, I was delighted - they had this soft pretzel log in there! And to top it off, mustard butter, with whole mustard seeds! I was obsessed.

I want to try the Rold Gold Thins with homemade mustard butter now. Can you even imagine???? Although, the beauty of pretzels, is the simplicity - I love 'em alone, probably even more. I dare say they are the perfect snack.

Iced Coffee Done Right

I read a great piece in the NY Times yesterday about iced coffee, the drink you see in every New Yorker's fist from Memorial Day until Labor Day, that's just catching on in the rest of the country. And I'm not talking about a 600 calorie pseudo-milkshake from Starbucks. I'm talking cold coffee. On ice, and how you take it. The simplicity is the beauty, and while I still prefer hot coffee most days, I do enjoy the occasional iced coffee as an afternoon pick-me-up, or on the weekends. It's easier to drink and carry than a hot cup.

Even though I just discovered the joy of ice coffee only 3 years ago, after being a resister, I have to say what the writer said in this article is true: that NY iced coffee is generally a weak, watery concoction barely able to claim itself as iced coffee. The key, she says, it to brew it double strength, with coffee ice cubes. And it must be done at home. This woman is my new guru.

I am a one cup-drinker in the mornings, at home. I have a pod coffee maker that I love, but can't seem to find the pods anymore. So I've moved on to making coffee in my French Press the evening before and chilling it for a nice ice in the morning. It works well, and I like the consistency (little thicker, but not syrupy) than what I'd buy at say Dunkin' Donuts or my local cart vendor. But I made the coffee ice cubes yesterday. And it was that much better. Like, WOW.

Take heed - homemade iced coffee is the best you can get. Especially when you make the coffee cubes.

The pedosmile is the giveaway

So the latest photos of the dude who killed JonBenet - so creepy. I mean, these types of people are really just so obvious.

Recipe for Disaster

Ok, a while back, I blogged about some lame Rachael Ray recipe (at the very top there). But this new one from Ellie Krieger really takes the cake. So is she the braniac who came up with this?

Air Guitar is the New Black

If you know what's good for you, you'll come to discover all the joy that is AIR GUITAR tomorrow, Aug. 9.

See for yourself:
http://www.readpenguin.com/ToAirInviteAnime.html

Wildlife in the Hudson

It's not everyday you see a manatee swimming in the Hudson River. I think you might have a better chance of seeing a body (not that I'd want to, but I bet it's true). Hope he stays safe and gets out OK. And let's hope he doesn't taint the rest of his buddies in Florida with the Hudson stank, courtesy of the most heavily trafficked waterway in the U.S.

Mother Nature is One Cranky Biyatch

Isn't kind of interesting to think that at this time last year, we'd had no days over 100 degrees, yet had already had like 12 hurricanes.

Now, we've had 3 days over 100, and only 3 hurricanes. Even though the heat sucks, it's less damaging, so I'll take that over a hurricane, but still. Is Father Time having trouble getting it up? Is that why Mother Nature is such a hateful bitch this year?

Dessert of the Gods

I just had one of the best desserts of my life - Banoffee at The Spotted Pig in the West Village here in NY.

Crumbly shortbread cookie-like crust, layered with bananas and caramel, topped with pillowy whipped cream and chocolate shavings. Seriously....I will dream about this.

I think the only other thing that beats this is the Nutella Chocolate Cake at Deborah, also in the West Village.

I suppose I am so jealous of Funbag's blog that I am trying to channel her with my food longings here.

Happy 25th, MTV!

MTV has reached their Quarterlife Crisis! Congrats!

Ah, remember the days when videos were actually MTV's innovative thing....with Downtown Julie Brown, and Remote Control, and Yo! MTV Raps.

Well, you have to give them credit for the empire and brand they've built from such humble beginnings. Raise a glass - I want my MTV!