CNN.com foils me again!

Well, at least it's not my home page on my personal computer. However, the lame headlines at CNN.com do intrigue me at times, and I cave - even if it's just clicking through to read the lame first 3 sentences (I don't mess with the crap "Story Highlights" mumbo-jumbo). But the one feature that I find myself obsessed with and not being able to turn away from are the photos. When I see that arrow within a story that shows more than one picture is available, it's the jackpot.

I guess since I don't read tabloids (I refuse to pay $4 for a magazine that is all pictures of celebs, although I will glance at one now and again at, say, the gym, or on a long flight), it's my fix.

Sidenote: It's the darkest evening of the year. And The Darkest Night of the Year goes to Over the Rhine, my favorite band's lovely holiday album. Their original song "Mary's Waltz" is gorgeous.

Rip Van Winkle

These days, you can call me Rip Van Winkle or Sleeping Beauty. Basically, I have been back to the humbling midwest for 49 days (more than a month, not quite 2). The New York pining has begun....in bits and pieces. There will always be things I miss about New York - the pizza, the bagels, my friends, the food choices, the walking everywhere, running in Central Park, NYSC, 3 Banana Republic's with amazing sale selections within a 10-block radius of my apt, etc.

Sidenote: Bagels are so mediocre here, and just not quite "right" that they must be toasted. And I have caved in to this.

But back to my post. The thing I absolutely, in no way whatsoever, don't miss is lack of sleep. I actually never really realized how sleep-deprived I was in NY until I came back here. In NY, I would get up one, sometimes two times a night to go to the bathroom because I was awakened by something - car, alarm, loud building tenants, dog barking, garbage truck, yelling, etc. I was in a constant state of exhaustion, no matter how much sleep I got.

Now, in the 49 days that I've been back, I dream again (I kind of want to stop remembering them, as they are fucked up and very macabre. I am positive that Tim Burton directs them), and sleep soundly. In fact, I'm so rested, I don't find myself needing that mid-afternoon caffeine fix anymore. It's quite pleasant.

All said, I do look forward to the day when a 4 AM sanitation truck rumbling my windows wakes me again. I do love me some big-city-livin'. But I also like catching up on 7 years of sleep deprivation.

QVC

Lately, I have been flipping through the 5 or so TV shopping channels that are at the beginning of the channel lineup these days. This was the predecessor to internet shopping. Now, having worked in the book biz, we like these shows - they still sell a crapload of books. Who's buying, who knows? I don't know how you can even watch these channels for more than a minute because they stuff they sell is some of the most hideous garbage I have EVER seen.

Ok, to their credit, there is some decent stuff for sale. The skin care lines and make-up lines seem to be doing well. And at least it's name brand stuff. But who thinks the jewelry is attractive? The clothing? It looks old-ladylike and costume-y. Maybe it's just because I'm over gold jewelry. But the combinations of stones they put together...they must be designed by someone who's color-blind.

This is what my life has bubbled down to. Blogging about QVC. Yikes.

I'm back!

More in the next post...at least it's not a New Year's Resolution this year! I'm going out with a bang, baby....

Save the books!

Books are an endangered species. Well, not books per se - believe me, we publish more and more of them every year. But book coverage is shrinking - already in the last year we've (collective we, as in "the book publishing industry," of which I am part of) seen 4 major metro newspaper nix coverage altogether. And now, the latest casualty, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. But finally, an uproar!

The industry will not take this. Already I see more reviews and coverage of video games than books anymore. It's an uphill battle that I wage daily, as a publicist who's main job description is to get review coverage for books. In the more than 6 years that I have been in this industry, I've seen it change dramatically - for the better and worse. I won't get into the boring details here.

But, if you read books, as I do, or you like books, or even if you just use them to wipe your ass (blasphemy!), sign the petition to save book coverage (and perhaps, books) here.

And after that, read a hilarious posting from one of my favorite all-around great authors (and people) George Saunders, certified genius. And join his Army here.

CNN NOT Breaking News

Contrary to popular belief, this is not breaking news, CNN. Or anyone else for that matter, unless you're a tabloid.

Are we fighting a war here, people, or what?!

Happy 20th, Fox!

Dear Fox,
Thank you for bringing us Married, With Children, the Gary Shandling Show, the Tracey Ullman Show, and the Simpsons (and more recently Arrested Development).

Sorry you ever went to the dark side and had to bring us Bill O'Reilly and Geraldo, and Joe Millionaire, and I Want to Marry a Millionaire and other crappy reality shows.

So fondly I remember Al Bundy and Francesca. Happy birthday!

The Latin Mint

So who knew? Tic Tacs are a product of Ecuador (says so right on the package).

Damn I love the orange ones. So un-minty, but sweetly delicious for just 1.9 calories per mint! Sugar kick, hi-yaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Crap, I also can't stop eating them.

I love you FCC!

Finally, the FCC does something smart by banning cell phone use on airplanes!

Just having to deal with morons talking on their cell phones on city buses, which is the most annoying thing ever (and don't even get me started on the dumb girl behind me in the lunch line yesterday who was talking to someone about what to get for lunch...lame!), the air travel cell phone debacle would be disruptive an unbearable. Especially when you think about how loudly people would have to talk to be heard over the plane noise. I know I have to crank my headphones when I'm on a plane because of this large, noise-inducer called an engine.

Let's hope this rule sticks (and if the FAA can please just relax the damn carry on rules so I don't have to check everything? Thanks).

Crazy Train Rides Again

I'm just thrilled (sense the sarcasm) to see that batshit Judith Regan is back. And clearly more childish and moronic than ever. Goodie gumdrops! Crash and burn, lady, crash and burn!


Regan Launches New Venture
Judith Regan, whose publishing company was shut down last December by imprint HarperCollins, has founded a new publishing venture. Like ReganBooks, Chutzpah Press will specialize in what Regan, in a long, rambling statement, called "books that go to the edge, call into question, get in the face, never surrender and are distinguished by utter originality."
Chutzpah's first title, scheduled to be released in the second half of July, is called Harry Potter and the Secret of the Purpose-Driven Da Vinci Code Life.Chutzpah's literary imprint, Schizophrenic House, has already signed up several volumes of poetry and thoughtful first fiction.
In her announcement, Reagan also complained of being unfairly forced to stay after school one day in fourth grade.

JT brings sexy, etc. back

So I am clearly way slow on the curve here (and I'm still one of the people who generally watches SNL), but this is some of the most hilarious shit ever.

Checkit.

Oh happy day!

Well, I sure as hell wish I was in Iceland or Scotland today, because they have some stellar holidays today:

Scotland: Whuppity Scoorie
Iceland: Beer Day

Well, Iceland's holiday is self-explanatory. And I like it! But what is this "Whuppity Scoorie" in Scotland? These are the people who came up with haggis and kilts, so lord knows.

Well, after some sleuthing, I discovered the basic gist of Whuppity Scoorie:

It's an ancient Scottish custom (possibly Pagan) marking the rite of spring, and youths celebrate it by running around the church three times, while swinging balls made of paper round their heads, and afterwards, pick up coins being thrown to them by the organizers of the festival (aka the church). Also, the balls are called widdershins. The lingo is all very Harry Potter or Dr Seuss (speaking of Dr Seuss, today is the 50th Anniversary of The Cat in the Hat!).

Balls and coins? Sounds like Mardi Gras to me.

Spamburger Hamburger!

Who knew Spam was so revered! I mean, it's not as good as bacon, but I've been known to enjoy it in days of yore...and had the t-shirt to prove it.

From Reference.com
Fact of the Day: Spam

SPAM, the treat made from pork shoulder and ham with secret spices, was invented in Austin, Minnesota, in 1937 by Jay C. Hormel; his father, George A. Hormel, was founder of the company that produced the food. Since its introduction, more than six billion 12-ounce cans of SPAM have been produced. J.C. Hormel wanted a unique name for the product, which was originally called Hormel Spiced Ham, and held a naming contest. Kenneth Daigneau, an actor and the brother of a Hormel vice president, won the $100 prize for the name SPAM, which he made by combining the words spice and ham. The number one SPAM-consuming state in the U.S. is Hawaii, whose residents eat more than four cans per person annually. Nikita Khrushchev, leader of the former Soviet Union, credited SPAM for saving his army during WWII. SPAM is the butt of many jokes, but is taken seriously enough by some to have inspired a 16,500-foot SPAM museum in Austin, Minnesota (opened in 2001) and an official SPAM Fan Club.

Make fat lazy kids even lazier (but sans fat)!

Now this is ridiculous on many levels. First, why would you put your child at risk for this type of surgery? Second, get off your couch and exercise. I am sick of an easy fix for everything in this country. What happened to the old American motto of work hard for what you get?

We're a coddled, overmedicated, overfed, overindulged, lazy society who thinks everything is owed to us and should be served on a silver platter. Holding some extra weight? Don't try to eat healthier, or exercise, exert some effort or some control over your appetite. Just go under the knife! Easy-peasy!

Aw, you went to college, and now have a lame entry-level job? Sure, have mom and dad support you while you live in a major urban area and drop cash on bottle service at clubs and cabs, so you can wear your $500 Manolos to work (that your parents also paid for).

You know, some of us still have to work, and work hard for things in our lives. I will never take for granted the weight I'm currently losing, on my own, through a combo of diet and exercise. I want to do it on my own. How much sweeter it will be when I've reached my goal. And it's hard. But life is.

And I've been living in the most expensive city in the country (and one of the most in the world), where I started on a $25,000 a year salary. Sure, I've run up credit card debt and have struggled every minute I've been here, even taking a part-time job and babysitting gigs. And I'm currently sick of being poor. But through actual hard work, and fighting for what's deservedly mine in my job, I've been promoted, and my salary has increased. It's so much better having earned it on my own merits. My parents would never let me starve, but they didn't have the means to pasome exorbitant rent for me, just so I could live in a hip neighborhood, or a doorman building, or a huge swanky loft.

I'm glad I at least have a reality check. I'm sick of people who don't. They're detrimental to society.

The least of our worries

Ok, perhaps this stunt by the Cartoon Network was in poor taste.

But I think it is absolutely absurd that the two guys (who are probably lower level employees with the marketing firm) who were chosen to place them in locations are being arrested. I mean, the were just the messenger - I think the big guys should be more resposible than the poor worker bees.

Also, isn't this just a bit overreacting? I mean, it was basically a flashing Lite-Brite. Come on people, paranoid, some?

The Super Bowl drivel begins

You know who's not funny? Mo Rocca.

You know who has a Super Bowl column in USA Today? Same un-funny man.

I guess I have to give the guy credit for becoming an ultra-talking head. I mean, he comments on everything from Iron Chef to the Super Bowl. Too bad none of it is worth listening to.

Say it ain't so

Sadly, I don't generally care about celebrities. I hate tabloids and reality TV (though on occasion, have been known to leaf through a tabloid when faced with no other option, hypocritcial, I know).

However, the official break-up of Cameron Diaz and Justin Timberlake saddens me a bit. They were the long haul (3+ years). They seemed like the real deal. And I basically think the both of them, for celebrities, seem fairly grounded and are really funny (JT kills when he hosts SNL, Cameron is goofy in a funny way).

Another one bites the dust...

De-Pants

I'll make sure I'm not on or near the 6 train tomorrow afternoon (from DailyCandy):

Annual No Pants Subway Ride
What: Wear normal winter clothes, swipe your MetroCard, ride the 6 train, then take ’em off.
Why: You’ve seen London. You’ve seen France.
When: Sat., 3 p.m. sharp!
Where: Meet near the black sculpture at Foley Sq., b/t Centre & Lafayette Sts.
Click here for a map.

Snow!

Finally, snow! Well, it lasted a total of about 3 minutes, but there were definitely flurries coming down.

We finally broke the record of most days without snowfall in 128 years (January 4 was the day).

So fleeting, but a nice sight!

Oh happy day!

Just scored a total coup on concert tickets, and couldn't be happier this Friday morning. Arcade Fire, here I come on Feb. 13! 5 shows sold out in 10 minutes.

Of course, in hindsight, I probably should have bought an extra ticket, and could have sold it for a profit. Not so together after all this morning, I guess.

Moron of the Week

So soon into the new year, and we already have a moron for the week!

Don't people check their airline tickets before clicking on submit???

Supermorons

So I was just futzing around my pad on this ultra-lazy last day of vacation (so very very sad) and happened to start watching the TV show "Supernanny." And holy shit. These kids are bad. But the parents are IDIOTS. I mean, it's really appalling how clueless they are and how they let their kids walk all over them. And let them get away with so much.

It's frightening that they're allowed to parent - I can't even imagine how these kids act in school. I would hate to be that teacher. Yikes!

2007 is almost a day old!

Happy New Year! Let's hope it's a good one!